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 "You're better off without me."

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Join date : 2012-07-05
Age : 18
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PostSubject: "You're better off without me."   Sun Sep 23, 2012 7:08 pm

I could either loose him forever or fight for the one person who never gave up on me.

Knowing the decision she had made, she nodded in Jackson's direction. "We need to talk."

Nodding in an agreement, Jackson gulped, staring down at the ground, not knowing what to say. "What you said hurt. I'm not going to baby you and lie. Telling me that I'm a bastard." Shaking his head, he sighed, "It made me feel low. Like I had done something to deserve it."

"You could never deserve these kinds of words being thrown at you... what I said was uncalled for and I shouldn't have jumped into conclusions. I know you don't have feelings for Miranda. I know that you're not seeing her behind my back... but, something inside of me snapped and all of a sudden, it was as if you had been lying to me all this time."

"But it isn't your fault, and before you cut me off, just hear me out." When she blankly stared up at him, Jackson took that as his cue to continue. "You've hit rock bottom. There's no going around it nor denying it. What's been going on in your life.. it's more than anybody could handle. What happened to your dad is the reason you're battling your inner demons right now because you haven't let it go yet. His death is still fresh in your mind. It's replaying over and over again in your head without you even realizing it. You keep what happened around everywhere you go. When something bad happens, you remember your dad and how you couldn't protect him. You're desperate to keep order, afraid that if you made the wrong move, it'll all happen again."

When Kelsey's eyes softened, he knew he was right. Frowning, he licked his lips. "When Luke's gang attacked and we were being chased on our way back home, it all struck you and the thought of somebody else dieing because of your line of work pulled you into the dark place you tried so hard to avoid."

Vulnerability shadowed her features as Kelsey pouted her lower lip, "I'm afraid you'll be next. I can't loose you."

"Kelsey—"

"The image of you cold and passed out on the floor with a bullet through your chest..." She shook her head, shaking the violating thought from her mind though in the depths of her hazel orbs, the fear was clear.

"Don't think like that Kelsey."

"You're my everything... without you, nothing makes sense." Blinking up at him, tears glistened in the corners of her eyes. "I need to protect you."

"You need to protect yourself." He murmured, "Stop thinking about me and everyone else. You need to focus on getting yourself better."

"They'll take you away from me," Kelsey mumbled, her eyes staring off into space as her body stood there numbly.

"Kelsey—"

"They know how important you are to me... they'll hurt you in order to get to me." She spoke blankly.

"No Kelsey, they won't." Jackson urged, trying to shake her out of her sudden trance. "I promise Kelsey. You'll keep me safe and so will your gang. They'll make sure nothing happens to me."

Anger flashed inside her eyes and before he knew it, Kelsey balled her hands into fists. "Are they all you can think about?" She barked, her eyes raging with fury.

"No Kelsey, I only have eyes for you and you know it."

"But I can't have you." Kelsey countered, her eyes blazing with fury. "I just can't!"

Jackson stood there, confused as hell, "What?"

"I'm too dangerous for you."

"Kelsey." He spoke, knowing where she was heading with this, "Don't let your demon control you again."

"As much as I think I can protect you, the truth of the matter is I can't." Drifting her eyes away from his, she began facing the outside world instead of him. The world that screwed her over up multiple times, "You're better off without me."

Jackson stood there, not knowing what to say.

"I know I'm wrong for you. You can try to deny it all you want, but it's the truth. I'm a screw up; I'm crazy, stubborn. I'm so screwed up, everything is falling apart and I can't fix it!" Beginning to yell, she finally let the tears escape her eyes, her view becoming blurry. "I'm fucked up in the head!" Taking in deep breaths, she tried to calm herself, but it was impossible. She was having another mental breakdown. Letting herself fall to her knees, she cried nonstop, continuing with her yelling. "I'm a criminal, I've hurt you—a lot. I've screamed at you, I threw things! And now look at us!" Not letting Jackson getting the chance to respond, she continued, lowering her voice. "We're toxic together, yet, not matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to let you go..."

Her breakdown made Jackson to just stand there in awe.

"I came here with the intentions of making things right between us but come to think of it, I need more than reconciling. I need help."

"Okay," He nodded, "We can do that. We can get you—"

"No," She shook her head, rising up to her feet, "not that kind of help."

"What do you mean then?"

"You, Jackson," Pausing, he wiped her tears with the back of her hands. "Only you can help me."
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