"I thought that if he had to die because of me, I might as well do the same for him."

A sudden bolt of electricity shot through him as he sat up in bed, looking all around him. Noticing the empty space beside him and that Kelsey was gone, he quickly stood up. Walking around the bed, he looked over to see all the glass had been cleaned up with no sign of Kelsey anywhere.

Just as he was about to walk out of the room to search for her, he found the balcony doors attached to her room wide open, a silhouette of a shadow outside.

Furrowing his eyebrows, not knowing if that was her or not, he tip-toed over to the open air, to see Kelsey staring out into the sky, her hair swirling with the wind, a distant look in her eyes.

His stomach fell as he noticed her hand closed around something, a shiny residue slipping from its hold and dripping down to the ground below. "Kelsey?"

She didn't flinch 'nor move. Instead, she stayed still, as if she hadn't heard what he said.

"Kelsey." Walking over to her, he nearly choked on his saliva once he noticed she was bleeding, and the first thought that occurred to him was, "not again...". "Look at me," He urged gently, placing his hand over hers.

When she moved her hand away, he knew she wasn't in the right mind to listen to him which meant he had to go about this in a different way.

"Open your hand for me darling, let me see what you're hiding. I promise I won't get mad when I find out." He soothed, wrapping his arm around her waist.

Shaking her head, she wiggled away, tightening her grasp on whatever it was she was holding.

Jackson took a sharp intake of air as he held his breath, his stomach tumbling downwards and he could only imagine the damage she was doing to herself. "Kelsey, open your hand. Let me see what you're holding."

When she didn't say anything, he took that as his cue to try and do so himself. Taking her hand in his, he gently pried her fingers open to reveal a piece of glass dug into the skin of her hand.

A frown pulled at his lips. Tears cornered the brims of his eyes as he took the piece of glass out, discarding it over the balcony. Brushing his thumb against her wound, he watched as it oozed with blood. "Why did you do this?" He asked.

"I hurt you." She mumbled more to herself than him.

"No you don't, Kelsey. What the fuck are you talking about?" He looked up at her, inwardly begging her to become back to him again.

"I lied to you. I made you mad..." She shook her head, "you're going to leave me." She murmured softly, looking up at him.

"I'm not leaving Kelsey." He soothed, "I already told you. I'm not going anywhere."

"That's what they all say before they go." Kelsey's amber eyes masked over in glazed fashion. "Everybody leaves me in the end."

"I'm not everybody." He shook his head, "I'm not leaving."

"You promise?" She lowly whispered, internally begging him with her eyes not to go.

"I promise." Closing his eyes, he shook his head, reeling himself to stay strong. "Come on, let's get you all cleaned up." Dropping his hand down to hers, he grabbed it, taking her into the bathroom where he quickly wrapped her hand up the same way she did with him. "There, all better." Running the padding of thumb across the bandage, he down at her. "You okay?"

Nodding, she tugged her hand free from his hold. "Don't go." She mumbled.

"I won't, I won't..."

"Please, don't go." She whispered. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything."

"Don't do this to yourself, Kelsey." He begged. "Please, I'm not leaving. I'm staying here with you. Understand?"

Without another word, Kelsey stepped towards him before wrapping her arms around him and pulling him into a hug, digging her face onto his shoulder, holding him tightly in the process.

Returning the hug, he strengthened his grip around her waist, letting her know, he was here and wasn't going anywhere. "Come on, let's get you to sleep. You'll feel better in the morning."

"Are you coming with me?" A frantic look crossed her eyes, making his heart frown.

"Yes, I am." Taking her hand in his, he gave it a reassuring squeeze, leading her over to the bed. "You're going to be okay. I'm going to take care of you." He watched as Kelsey's breathing slowed down to an even pace as her face relaxed into a soft expression.

Laying his head back against the pillow, he looked up at the ceiling, all of what had just happened in the past few hours, running through his mind like wildfire.

Kelsey was fighting against it, she beat it and now she fell back into it again. She fell into darkness just when he thought she was going to be okay.

He shook his head, ridding of all thoughts as he now feverishly ran his fingers through his hair. There was only one way he knew of, that would help get her back on her feet again and it would take talking to Nathan to have this all work out.

Making sure Kelsey was fast asleep, he maneuvered his way out of his hold on her before grabbing a pair of skinny jeans and tugging them on, with a white t-shirt. Walking back over to Kelsey, he pressed a soft kiss to her cheek before taking off out the door and down the stairs where he found Zack pacing the floors with his head in his hands.

"Hey." He whispered, careful not to be too loud so that Kelsey wouldn't wake up and worry about where he gone.

Snapping his head over to him, a look of relief crossed his face. "You alright there bro?"

"Yeah man. A little worried, but, in overall, I'm fine." He forced a smile. "I just wanted to come down and let you guys know that we're okay and to talk to Nathan."

Swallowing, Zack swiped his hand across his mouth after he had licked his lips. "He had another one of her episodes, didn't she?"

Pulling a frown on her lips, he nodded. "Yeah."

"Shit," Zack sighed, pulling at the ends of his hair feverishly. "I was going to go up there when I heard the glasses being thrown, but, I didn't want to make things worse." Groaning, he threw his head back, exasperated. "I knew something was going on but... I didn't think it would have done that far." Looking back over at him, sadness overwhelmed his eyes. "I'm sorry."

"Aye, it wasn't your fault. I wasn't expecting this." Pausing, he thought back to it all and managed to speak aloud how he truly felt. "It just scared me. She scared me." And before he knew it, he found himself frowning. "She kept saying thing like, everything broken and telling me not to leave her."

"She was thinking about Mark... She didn't want you to leave her like he did." Zack explained in a hushed tone, upon seeing how thrown off he was by all of this.

"I could never leave her." He spoke truthfully. "Despite how many times I had thought about leaving her because of her lies, I can't. I love her too much."

"And she loves you, which is why you were able to save her in time to hurt herself again." Zack encouraged as he walked over to him. "The only people able to get to him was Nathan and I. You have a hold over her that none of us could even manage to pull. You could save her from herself, she knows it, too. She's just too stubborn to act on it."

"I wouldn't say that." He retorted. "I found her outside holding a piece of glass in her hand."

"Wait, what? When was this?"

"After we went to sleep." Shuffling on his feet, he licks his lips. "I woke up and noticed she was gone and I found her out on the balcony. I saw that there was something in her hand when I told her to show me, she didn't, but I managed to pry it open myself and I saw one of the glasses that was caused from the things she had thrown dug into her skin."

Firmly rubbing his fingers into his forehead, Zack took a deep intimate breath as he began pacing the floors once more. "This is worse than I thought."

"What does that mean?"

Ignoring Jackson's question, Zack asked one of his own. "What happened before you found her?"

Giving him a quizzical look, he restated to what had happened. "She told me about what happened after Mark died and how you found her home alone with.." He trailed off, not being able to finish that sentence, "She seemed to be find after that and then we got into a disagreement over her and then she just seemed.. distant. She went to take a shower and I started cleaning up the mess. I ended cutting myself by accident—"

"Wait, what did you just say?" Zack questioned, his eyebrows pulled together to meet as one as he listened intently to what he was about to say.

"I said that I cut myself by accident when I picking up the pieces of glass on the floor. I dropped them by accident."

"That's why she did what she did..." Zack exclaimed, a look of concern flashing in his eyes. "She thought, because she was the one who caused the mess, that you hurt yourself because of her. She blamed herself and did what she did in order to make herself feel better."

Kelsey's words from a couple months ago rang in his ears, ""I thought that if he had to die because of me, I might as well do the same for him."

"Just like what happened with Mark." He spoke, realization hitting him like a ton of bricks.

"Exactly."

"Then how do we help her?"

"We can't. There's nothing we can do. She has to come out of this herself. All we can do is to reassure her that everything's going to be okay and, as ridiculous as it sounds, we have to console her in the way we would to a child. We have to be patient, gentle, and careful with her because we don't know when she's going to snap."

"Alright." He nodded, taking this information in. "And what about.. Luke?" He subtly questioned.

"What about him?"

"I heard you guys talking. You guys can't plan anything with Kelsey like this. It'll only make things worse. She isn't in the right mind to be taking care of business right now or making decisions on her own."

"I'll take care of that."

"How?" He replied, licking his lips.

"Don't worry about it, we'll think of something." Zack reassured. "Come here bro." They bro hugged and as they released themselves, Zack shuffled onto his feet. "You know I'd never let anyone hurt her." Zack spoke.

"I know." He let out a breath of air. "I'm just scared for her, that's all."

"We all are. I know this is a side of Kelsey you've never seen before, but, I promise you that everything will go back to normal. You just have to give her time. With everything that's going on right now, I'm surprised she didn't loose it earlier."

"Me too," He murmured truthfully, knowing that he would if he was her. "Thanks."

"Yup."

"Have you seen Nathan by any chance? I need to talk to him."

"I think we went outside to make a few private calls. He should be back any minute now if you want to wait for him."

"Okay."

"Wait for me, for what?" Nathan asked in time for him to look up and see him making his way into the living room.

"I need to have a word with you." He mumbled, suddenly nervous, knowing, he had to let him know what was going on. "It's important."

"Are you okay? Did Kelsey loose her temper that made her injure you?" Apprehension hinted in his voice, putting his phone into the back pocket of his jeans.

"I'm alright. I have to talk to you about Kelsey."

Knowing where he was going with this, Zack spoke up in his behalf. "You know how we thought Kelsey was having one of her episodes tonight?"

Nathans' face fell, suddenly knowing where they were going with this. "Yeah?"

"It turns out she did... and it's more serious than we thought."

[Okay, so, I wanna explain this flashback since you might be really confused at the moment. xDDD

Kelsey had a mental breakdown and it happened once before in her life when Mark (her dad) died. When things like this happens, Kelsey looses her mind completely and doesn't know what she's doing anymore. She's emotionally unstable which is why she was all over the place in this post. She could seem to be fine one second, but in the blink of an eye, her own head could play games with her and she finds herself in depression once more.

I know, it's scary and you aren't used to this side of Kelsey, but it's crucial and I want to show you just what her lifestyle, being in a gang and all, can do to her. Behind every bad ass is not a boy who broke her heart, but a kid trying to fight for her life both emotionally and physically.

I wanted to show life as it would be for anybody who has to go through this at such a young age. Keep in mind, Kelsey was 13 when she joined and created the gang. She made her official name when she was 14, she is now 16. She's been going through this for 4 years and everything she's been through from loosing Mark, to being abused, deceived, Spencer (her ex, which was a long time ago) cheating on her, Jackson abusing her, breaking up with Jackson, Luke nearly killing Kelsey, Luke sneaking into Kelsey's room, killing Frank, going to jail multiple times, coming back, having a hard time trusting people, cutting, Luke trying to step into their territory has all began to take a toll on her.

There's more than meets the eye.

Jackson here is not only worried for Kelsey's life; he doesn't even know how to save her. Nobody can. At this rate, he could only encourage her to save herself.

This is only the beginning of what's to come. Don't worry, Kelsey wouldn't be like this for long. She'll go back to being her really sexy bad ass self in no time. ;D LOL.]